Black Day(probably the worst day i've ever lived)

OK...its really hard to talk about this but heres my story

I woke up at 5 pm on 25 of June, my cat was laid on my stomach, and he was acting nervous,it wasn't something normal,he never used to wake me up that way, like he's trying to tell me what was happening or for some reason he was acting so strange so finally i got off my bed
and turn imidiately the computer(as i always do), my mom was sleeping right next to me (the A.C. wasn't working the night before so we've had to sleep in the "computer and tv" room)
i finally got in the msn, and the window of my best friend "Sandra"... popped out, my thoughts were not even close for the news that i was about to receive...
at first she thought i knew about it, she was like "omg you dont know about it"
then she realise i was completely clueless...
when she told me he was rushed to the hospital, i was really exceptic about it, cuz obviously i thought it was another stupid publicity tabloid stunt,but then she told me "Michael just passed away" and i felt like a huge arrow got into my heart, i tried to be calm down but then she told me that i was on the news EVERYWHERE, i started to scream so loud i even woke up my mother, she heard me crying...my head was all in black, i just kept repeating "NOOOOOOOO MICHAEL NOOOOOO!!!"
My mom asked me what was happening, and i told her that Michael passed away, and she imidiately tried to convince me that i was a lie, she said that it might be fake cause they were saying alot of stupid stuff about him in the earlier days
but i didn't stop crying, i was crying so hard it was very difficult for me to breath
Then we turned the tv on, and it was right there...the ambulance and the anchors announcing that he died!!,i realise it was real and i screamed even more, my mom came up to hug me, i couldn't believe it, i felt like a part of my soul was gone with him, i did not stopped crying the whole day and night, i even broke up with my "virtual" boyfriend that day because he never said anything to comfort me, i was so sad i didn't care about him anyway, all i wanted was michael back, that night i grabbed my portrait of him, and hugged him when i went to bed, i was still crying, i woke up crying again the second day, all my family gave me sed they were sorry cause they knew how much i love him....

okay I saw on the news that he was rushed to the hospital but I thought hed be okay. So I went outside and I was up at my barn just watching my horses an taking random pics. At first when I read the text I thought oookkaayyyy just some random rumor or something. Then I remember my mom pulling in the driveway and I heard her yelling all through the house that michael jacksons passed away. I just fell on the ground and was soo shocked I couldnt and didnt want to believe it. That night all I did was watch the news on it over and over even the same stuff hoping it was all a lie or a dream and that id wake up and everything would be okay. I even got in a fight with my friend the next day cuz she hates him and I chewed her out for disrespecting him [you dont wanna know what she wa saying >X( ]The memorial was the sadest though I miss him and hope hes better off where hes at now R.I.P Sad

we miss you Michael....

The day was very strange for me as well. It was around 2:38pm where I live, there was strong winds and rain, it felt like a negative energy. I was on the computer at about 5 to 5:30pm where I live, until I found out that Michael had been rushed to the hospital! I was WORRIED! They kept saying that he passed away, I cried and prayed... Then it was official.. Michael had passed away. I cried SO hard, I couldn't feel my legs or arms, I didn't want to eat, and I didn't go to sleep until 3:30am the next day. It was the WORST day of my life. I love you so much Michael. RIP Michael xxx

I had just come home from working out on that Thursday, June 25. I got on Facebook, like I usually do, and I saw my cousin's status saying,"Don't Die On Me, Mike!" I thought,"WHAT?!", so I rushed over to the TMZ website and I saw the first headline on the page saying,"Michael Jackson Dead" I was crushed. All I could get up the strength to say was,"No. Michael, no. This can't be." I ran to the television, and CNN was saying that he was in a coma, while FOX News was saying he had passed, but they all confirmed it about an hour later. I just ran through the house screaming,"HE'S DEAD! MICHAEL NOO!!!!" I couldn't bring myself to fully accept that he was gone because it would hurt too much. I miss Michael so much, I want him back. I held out hope that he would come walking back into our lives, but I know he couldn't. Michael, I love you and miss you terribly. <3

hey once i heard the news i cried all day and night i couldn't stop the
tears they just poured down like a river i miss MJJ so much i cried
until i soaked my dry off towel and then as i watch the tribute i cried
my self in to a massive head ache and my head was pulsing with pain but
i still continued crying i still am crying now as i watch his videos the horrible way he was treated saddens me i cant believe hes gone
it cant be true i will never be happy again i feel so sick inside i
still remember the time i had a terrible day at school i was pick on
and i felt so alone coming home from school crying and mtv was on and
they played the video for you are not alone it gave me so much cheer
and i wasn't sad any more he is truly magical his music has healed my
broken heart from so much i wish i had a chance to tell him all that
hes done but i no longer can i am just suffering. THANK YOU Michael RIP. Black Day(probably the worst day i've ever lived) Icon_sad

ok it's not long but here it goes.

it was around 7ish when me n my sis were watchin' TV. My mom comes down n starts talkin' about how u loose someone. @ first i thought it was my grandma but when she said "It's Michael".... I FREAKIN' LOST IT!!
i said, "WHAT??? MIKE IS DEAD??? MY MICHAEL J JACKSON DIED?????"
then i ran up 2 my room n prayed my heart out on Y Michael had 2 die. It wasn't fair!! he did nothin' wrong!!! My love was taken away from me, n i didn't kno what 2 do next.
2 make it worse, i told my "friends" the next day n NOBODY understood where i was coming from! I never felt so alone in my life. A part of me was taken away, a part that i can never get back until i see his gorgeous face in Heaven.

in short, I MISS MY BABY BOI!!

I know I'm late on telling my story but, I only discovered this website today. I haven't been able to really express my feelings because nobody I know cares about how much MJ's death has affected me.

I wasn't home when I found out about Michael's death, I was on vacation in New York. I was at a family friends house when my grandma got a text from her son/my uncle saying that Michael had died. I was shocked, I ran to the TV and turned on cnn. They were saying MJ was in a comma so, I thought there was still some hope. A couple minutes later cnn and all news networks were saying Michael had passed away. I didn't believe it, I couldn't!!! I was in denial for a while coming up with anything I could to prove it wasn't true. I even thought maybe MJ faked his own death for a while there but, that was gone quickly. After I found out I was watching the news, documentaries, and anything I could on MJ. I still look for recent articles on the computer everyday. After the first couple days the sadness and depression of the situation kicked in. I cried, A LOT!!! As i'm writing this I'm crying! It hurts so bad to know that someone so beautiful and talented who absolutely didn't deserve what tabloids and haters and people put him through is dead. I wish so bad that I could have helped MJ with his pain in some way, even something small. I wish to god he didn't have to suffer but, I know that even though we've lost him he is in a better place and is HAPPY. I love and miss Michael very much!!!

This was probably one of the worst days of my life! I lost so many people that was close to me in my life. The previous year someone close to me died a year and three days before he did.

On that day, I was just browsing the computer when at like 4:00 pm my mom had called me. She said "Did you hear that Michael died?" I was like what?
After a while, after I was done talking to my mom, I was searching for like an hour. My grandparents said I went silent for a while. We turned in to the news and after a while they confirmed it as well. My grief was indescribable. My own godmother had to call and asked me if it was true. I sobbed as I answered yes. It really did hurt me. The only thing that was going through my mind was his kids. I was really worried about them the most. It still hurts, but I haven't stopped missing him.

i was in the store with my aunt then all of a sudden all my friends were texting me i denied it said it was publicity then another fan broke down in the store crying frantically i was still in denial i accepted it the next day it truly broke my heart i felt like a widow still feel it today my worst day ever

I had been visiting my parents for a few days. On that morning I slept in late. I wandered into the lounge, dad was watching tv and heard Michael get mentioned. "What are they trashing him for now?" I muttered angrily. "Honey..." Dad said slowly. "What?"
"He's dead, they say it was a heart attack." I went cold, staring blankly at the screen, now seeing the words at the bottom. "No, it can't be real." I said, my voice shaking. "I'm sorry. Are you okay?" dad said, worried. He told me later, the look on my face scared him, I looked like my world had crashed in. It had. I spent the next few days not sleeping or eating, just listening to his music and watching him on tv. After a week my parents had had enough and told me to snap out of it. "Michael would not want this! You're hurting yourself. He'd want you to be strong!" mum said angrily.

Realising they were right I did. I can't believe how badly his death affected me. I felt like I'd lost a member of my family or my best friend.

And months later it still hurts a lot. But at least now he's safe from those who hurt him.

THIS IS MY STORY- officially the WORST day ever

i was with my friend at my house and my other friend Lacey called me & was like "Alley im online and it says Michael Jackson's dead." i laughed at hr and sed "lacey stop your not funny." and she kept telling me and i just kept getting mad at her thinking it was a disgusting prank. so i hung up and asked my mom and she sed no hes not dead, look on the news. i turned on the news, and it sed he was being rushed into the hospital/ i froze and didnt move, tears spilling over my eyes. my friend tht was with me sed "he'll be fine" and my mom sed hes oka becuz hes Michael Jackson, he can do anything. "so i ate dinner. went back 2 the TV and evrywhere it sed he was dead. i sat there. frozen. my heart dropped and evrything was confusing. i fell to the floor, layed against the wall, and balled and cried. it hurt so bad. my friend hugged me. i kept screaming out loud. moaning his name. the tears were bad. my face was soaked and i cried for hours. i didnt move and i kept balling. my best friend who loves him too called me and we just sat on the phone and cried. i was attempting to kill myself...as crzy as it seems. i grabbed scissors and was going 2 cut my wrist. bt i looked at his face on my poster and i cudnt do it. he wudnmt want tht. i cudnt sleepp tht night and the next day my eyes were so sore i could barely open them, still crying. i wil nvr 4get tht day. the day where my life ended. i love you Michael.

i even made a poem about that day... here it is
IT was June 25th, about 4 o'clock
i turned on the news
and there was a shock
i didnt expect it
so frozen, there i sit
i couldn't think
their words were unclear
why me? i choked on the thick atmosphere
it got through my head
i whispered "hes dead"
i fell onto the floor and screamed and cried
and in those moments, i could have really died
but that's not what i wanted,
no not at all
i wanted HIM back in my life
but i felt my world fall
my heart was shattered and i couldn't see
as the tears blurred my vision and swept over me
my life was ruined. i sat there against the wall & broke down
no one understood, and they didnt make a sound
this pain wasn't real, it was a dream
or at least, that's what i wanted it to be
so i let the pain take over me
my heart was breaking
more and more every second
and the tears were far long gone...
because now it was ,ore,
it was a cry for help
a real breakdown
sheering pain
and that day, it rained
<3

MissyMike wrote:: ok it's not long but here it goes.

it was around 7ish when me n my sis were watchin' TV. My mom comes down n starts talkin' about how u loose someone. @ first i thought it was my grandma but when she said "It's Michael".... I FREAKIN' LOST IT!!
i said, "WHAT??? MIKE IS DEAD??? MY MICHAEL J JACKSON DIED?????"
then i ran up 2 my room n prayed my heart out on Y Michael had 2 die. It wasn't fair!! he did nothin' wrong!!! My love was taken away from me, n i didn't kno what 2 do next.
2 make it worse, i told my "friends" the next day n NOBODY understood where i was coming from! I never felt so alone in my life. A part of me was taken away, a part that i can never get back until i see his gorgeous face in Heaven.

in short, I MISS MY BABY BOI!!

i know how u feel. noone understood my pain.and STILL noone does except one person. and it hurts. it rly does. i almost cut my wrists one time. i felt like a widow, really. i was sad for tht week and i kept 2 myself, since i didnt want anyone bt him and it didnt matter becuz noone helped me. 2 make it worse, i heard from my BFs coausin tht is my best friend tht he laughed at it. so i dumped him. its like this life is pointless now. and when my day comes. . . it wont be so bad. because the first thing i'll do is run to him, and spend eternity there. by the way, go to youubve and type in the song Better On The Other Side. its by chris brown, p diddy, and boyz 2 men. its a soung about Michael Jackson they wrote. it's rly sad. i just heard it 2day and started crying

I know how y'all feel. It was like a part of me died with him too. Though my mom probably won't admit it, a part of her childhood died that day too. She was 12 when Thriller came out and she just grew up listening to him. It was through my grandmother though that I learned about him. I never regretted watching Thriller when I was 5. I still love him and that won't change.

i was heartbroken i cried for forever
i so wanted to meet him at least

I won't give a detailed discription, I'm afraid I won't be able to without getting too upset.
I will say that it was so hard for me to.. just.. grasp the idea of Michael being gone.. it still is.
I remember, I had to go to school that day, I had a maths test that I couldn't miss without a note... I didn't write anything on my test, I couldn't even think straight.
Before school when I got in the car the radio came on and it was Don't Stop Till You Get Enough... I almost screamed. I couldn't bare to listen to it.
I didn't listen to Michael's music all day, it was all over the radio but I knew it would just upset me, I couldn't even think about hearing his voice, or seeing his face.
Then they had pictures on the news.. god.. it was horrible.

That's all I'm going to say right now, I don't want to get all teary again.
Big hugs to everyone, I know I'm not the only one who is still trying to get over Micahels death, and I know I probably never fully will.

S.cattered wrote:: I won't give a detailed discription, I'm afraid I won't be able to without getting too upset.
I will say that it was so hard for me to.. just.. grasp the idea of Michael being gone.. it still is.
I remember, I had to go to school that day, I had a maths test that I couldn't miss without a note... I didn't write anything on my test, I couldn't even think straight.
Before school when I got in the car the radio came on and it was Don't Stop Till You Get Enough... I almost screamed. I couldn't bare to listen to it.
I didn't listen to Michael's music all day, it was all over the radio but I knew it would just upset me, I couldn't even think about hearing his voice, or seeing his face.
Then they had pictures on the news.. god.. it was horrible.

That's all I'm going to say right now, I don't want to get all teary again.
Big hugs to everyone, I know I'm not the only one who is still trying to get over Micahels death, and I know I probably never fully will.

Me niether honey, we all feel the pain of losing this man.
Some of my friends tell me to get over it but I just flip them off and walk away, cuz I never will.

^ I was surprised how understanding so many people were actually.
My teachers (well, the ones that matter) were even concerned about me, and people in my year that aren't really my friends, they all gave me hugs and stuff on the day, I was amazed.
Poor girl in my year, it was her birthday that day. Sad

That must have been terrible for her. I'd never be able to celebrate another birthday again without feeling bad.

Yeah, I know right?
I mean, she wasn't a huge fan of Michael's or anything. But she didn't hate him or anything. Still, that's gotta suck.

this is so hard to talk about for me personaly i dont like to think about...but

I woke up and ( i just happened to ) put on a fave MJ t-shirt of mine and went into the kitchen and turned the tv and computer on. then it came up on the news and i was like " what? no way " thinking it was all lies and then all the news channels had it and i just fell to my knees and silently cried my heart out. and every night after that i just cried. i would look at my posters and photos of him, all happy and smiley and i would cry. REALLY cry, i sounded like a banshee!
but now its just silent crying but the pain never eases. this may sound dumb and it does to me but it just gets better then worse. its a cycle for me. i know im not making much sense but...i seem to build up stronger then i would see a really nice tribute vid ( like yours jess it had me crying to hard ) or i would think back to listening to the songs on the HIStory cd ( my first MJ cd ) when i was like 4 and i would just lose it and scream and cry. i can picture those days as a kid seeing Moonwalker for the first time SO VIVIDLY its scary! i still have the old recorded vid of Moonwalker in a yellow case. i watched it every night it seems. i watch it so much i knew every word, move and sound off by heart when i was 7!
im glad im not alone with how i feel. people make fun of me in school and my family do too but i really couldnt care less!! x

ps thanks Jess for making this site x

On the day I grieved worst for Michael, I was alone at home and I was screaming and sobbing
MICHAEL! Michael I miss you!
I was crying so bad and I was shaking.
I felt like his presence was completely absent. I felt like he wasn't there on earth any more.
I cried all day.
That was my darkest day I ever lived.

I don't cry about anything. Even as a child I rarely cried.
But when my friend Alex called me sobbing and said those words. "Michael's gone."
He knew I hardly ever watch TV and didn't I have internet then.
I didn't want to believe it but knew Alex would never joke about something like this.
It felt like I've been punched in the gut, like the whole world had gone dark.
I wept so long and hard, it felt like all the tears I had never cried all my life were pouring out.

And now it being so close to that dreadful date, I can feel the tears coming again so I'm going to stop now.

I love you Michael, you are the moon that glows in my heart.

I found out on the news. Ironically enough, I was on YouTube, listening to "Thriller". Then my mom said, "Oh my god...Calista, come here!" (Calista is my full first name, BTW. Not just Cal.) So I put the video on pause and rushed to where my mom was standing. My mom's like, "Michael Jackson is dead!" And there it was, the chilling headline, "Michael Jackson dies".
I was in shock.
I was thinking to myself, "What the...?? What happened?? I didn't see that coming! How did this happen??"
Now, I wasn't a big, huge fanatic when he died, but my love for him gradually started building up until I was a huge fanatic. One day, I saw a Michael Jackson tribute video. It said stuff about him being a superstar pop icon, a legend, an idol..."It was supposed to be the start of a new era...The "This Is It" era..." ...BOOM! There it was! A picture of Michael Jackson, unconscious. "...Until June 25, 2009, death snatched him away." I was sobbing my eyes out as the video went on. And I still needed 5 more minutes after the video to stop crying and wipe the tears away.
Looking back at it, Michael Jackson's death was the worst day of my life.

Awww *hugs* :'(

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